[AusRace] After prawns - Darts and the Jesuit

[norsaintpublishing at gmail.com]

Know what you're saying about youngsters, cricket and swearing Tony.
I blame attending cricket matches as a youngster to watch my father play
and hanging around while they had a drink after the game, for my appalling
language nowadays. Reckon I heard every swear word ever invented from the
mouth of one particular individual, who it must be said was a very good
fella, nonetheless.
Much to their credit, the previous generation seemed to be much more self
disciplined when it came to bad language.


On Wed, 18 Sep 2019 at 14:29, Tony Moffat <tonymoffat at bigpond.com> wrote:

> There are 10 pages of typewriting here and not a horse, horserace or
> betting
> anecdote in any of it.
> It was good typing it while it rained today and now the woodshed beckons
> Cheers
>
> Tony
>
> When I was 11 Dad got promoted and moved to a new town, a territory to him,
> and I went to the catholic primary school. It was small, and packed with
> children,
> there were 57 in one room, three classes, 9 in the form after mine, 19 in
> mine
> and the rest in the form before, fecundity or what.  It went to high
> school,
> Leaving,
> but changes were coming, years 11 and 12, science outside the scriptures,
> and really
> the numbers thinned noticeably as the forms progressed, nobody did the
> Leaving
> for the two years I was there. The natural curve was to transfer to the
> central school,
> the pagan public school system, and a lot did that, me included, but in a
> year or more.
>
> There were 54 of us during this week of sporting how-to revelation. 3 did
> not
> attend, but I saw them under the sale yard bridge, yabbying, and two of
> those never
> returned.
>
> There was a priest who taught us, for a week or so, about sports and the
> dynamics of running and throwing, falling, jumping, catching, and hitting
> a ball, and kicking the thing too. That was great, those lessons, and we,
> the whole room took them, although there were no course notes, no
> text book, no references, just the words of a studious man to listen to.
>
> I have always thought that the cut shot in cricket defies the laws of
> physics, then what would I know, I have never played a cut shot, but we
> got to see one, in slow motion, in the class room and after school we got
> to see the shot again and again, I don't think the priest understood how
> interested we were and had become.
>
>  His explanation of the physics of the games, a lot of them, were
> fascinating and I have not seen or read about it since. He was unafraid to
> involve Newton, the gravity guy, in his explanations and demonstrations.
> Funnily, I tackled him 4 times, you know, ran with him then ducked in and
> took his legs out, so they wouldn't work, wouldn't support him, and all
> the while he talked and explained the dynamics in that.
>
>  I don't mean to rant, but it was interesting. I could use the information
> from
> him in a presentation for a school bursary, a scholarship, in a few years,
> I
> did too,
> wrote, then spoke when selected for it, almost word for word what that
> priest said about the tackle, the dynamics in a front on tackle, my weight
> against yours, speed and energy, and the transference of energy through
> mass at speed.
>
>  I stood at the judges desk, those deciding if I got the bursary, and used
> a writing pad as a playing field, a whistle as me, a Parker pen as the
> opposing player,
> a bottle of ink as the opposition team, and a wooden ruler as our
> advancing,
> slanted
> line, and explained that if the 5/8th stood a little wider, with a break
> away a little closer,
> the attacking team had 5, or 9 more options to generate a move, provided
> the
> front rowers
> caught the pass. I smiled at this point, but nobody else did, they being
> all
> forwards I reckoned, and
> I did not mention their inabilities again. I was tested on scenarios, which
> seemed to become
> an endless question of what, and how, and I got the point across that it
> was
> me, us, that had to
> stand, retain, and deliver the ball to enable a maul to continue on up the
> field. In my case, as answers,
> I just maintained a drone of tackle, tackle, tackle, pretty much what I did
> in a game anyway, stop the ball, stop the ball carrier.
>
> This may have won it for me, that scholarship, which is formalized by the
> passing of a medal, in a case, from the chair person to me.
> He dropped it, that case, really he made a charade of that, looked at me
> and
> laughed. Not me though.
>
> But the field demonstration with the Priest went on for several days.
>  I got him front on as well as tackling from behind, all the while he was
> commentating on what he was doing, what was happening between him and I,
> the energy transference taking place, and up to this point I just figured
> that stopping the legs was stopping the runner.
>
> The  running of the lines was always going to be interesting.
>
> He explained that for every sideways step you lose half a step up field.
>  At training and in the game I was tasked to make 9 yard gains, repeatedly,
> and knowing what he said I am
> pretty sure I always ran straight, ran at the other team, often, with that
> count in my head 8, 9,10,11,12 as each foot fall occurred knowing, hoping
> I had the 9 needed to fulfil my job. It is true that I counted out aloud,
> as an energy focusing prompt more often, when in possession of the footy
> so that I got called 'The Count', and that was a sledge, terrifying.
> Actually you
> don't get called lots of names in schoolboy rugby.
>
> LLike a tennis player in the modern era who used his
> hand pointed like a cobra to focus himself, I said numbers for the same
> end.
>
> That cricket lesson, the late cut, the French, the drive, the pull, got
> repeated and really got a lot of us interested in the game. I thought it
> was just put bat on ball and ignore the bullying, and there is a bit of
> it, even at school level. In effect, I didn't get to play the cut, before,
> or at any time, never tried it really, and I played so little cricket I
> perhaps was never going to do anything else other than slog the ball, in
> line with the pitch, or across the line, anticipating the bounce and
> swotting the pill way out there.
>
> David, in my class, was so energized by the words and actions of the
> Priest that he became a good batter, and played senior cricket although
> this
> was several years from now, and went
> several innings without getting bowled, or out any other way. David was so
> deliberate with his actions, lunging forward, moving his feet, seeing the
> ball for a long time before the bounce and the take after that. It is said
> he went 6 innings and was not dismissed. The score line was good, not
> extraordinary, but better because he was 14 years of age at this stage and
> playing
> strokes all over the place. He went away to school, on a cricket
> scholarship, and continued his good practice and reasonable scores there
> as well. He became a student, a medical type situation, and study there
> interfered with playing cricket here. I'm not sure how he got on in later
> life, in other teams. He was often two or more paces in front of his
> crease, down the pitch, then some balls he stayed put, the bowler was
> perplexed, and then he changed his grip on the bat, top hand became bottom
> hand and in the time between the ball leaving the bowlers hand and the
> ball arriving where he was he had gone from off to on, changed legs,
> cricketspeakwise,
> and belted the hated thing out through covers, out where there was nobody
> for a fair way. He stood facing the bowler too, not side on, golfer like,
> and had no back lift, he seemed cocked and ready with the bat back.
>
> A young teen can hear, and learn, all the swear words ever required in an
> afternoon of playing cricket well.
>
>  He was short on sixes, never had
> many 4's, and ran everything else, to the chagrin of his partner in the
> center, never opened the batting, that was pre-ordained as the son of the
> President or something, and came in at 4 or 5 in the order and really ran
> out of partners, the tail did not wag much. Did he get a century? He says
> so then he said he didn't know. He got out this once when he hooked a ball
> into a fielders armpit, caught, and anyway, they said, they removed the
> bail while he tended to the afflicted fielder, and left the field with
> him, caught, and stumped. His Captain, some of the fielders, and the
> President asked for an adjournment, there was a brief discussion and
> agreement
>  and he was re-instated, in the
> interest of fair play. In the interlude, the several minutes of all of
> this, David had packed up and was leaving, or had left.
> Back to swotting the books, he said. He had been caught, solid, he reckoned
> and had other things to do now.
>
> David got to be the Association best player, off his batting mainly, he was
> a
> so-so bowler, he just had a few ends so the quicks could get off and have a
> smoke really
> and his fielding was enthusiastic,  and in the context of the team,
> stunningly athletic.
> He never won an award for the Club, although as  I said he was demonstrably
> their best
> player if runs made and bowling averages and fielding dexterity are the
> scores to determine
> this. No, that son of the President got it, for breaking a cycle of ducks,
> 5
> consecutive, and
> really just set the field for a hook, then feed him, is all it took.
> Another
> got it after returning
> from surgery, but died from that before the presentation dinner, and still
> David came third for the year
> although the winner was worthy, he had played 5 games and painted the
> grandstand in his retirement,
> it was Newtown blue though, and strangely looked the same color as the
> railway station roof, where he had worked, painted mostly.
>
> Let me tell you some more, and there is a lot, about the Jesuit.
>
> At the football ground club room, in the grand stand,  there is a dart
> board,
> and two darts, and I think the current correct procedure was to bring your
> darts if darts are to be utilised, otherwise throw those two darts at the
> board, in the general direction of the board, or at least at the wall on
> which the board resides, then shout and yowl when one of your darts,
> un-aimed, encounters a triple something, a double of something else, or a
> bull, and maintain that is what you were aiming for, just that. Nobody in
> their right mind would occupy the bench seat below, or within 12 feet of
> that board, this was a no-go zone socially, and solely on the fact that
> those two darts, one of them, might land in your eyeball, with a shouted
> assertion from the thrower that, no, he wasn't aiming there.
>
> I haven't played a lot of darts, but my acquaintance, the Jesuit Priest,
> appears to have graduated, with dishonor, from the School of Darts,
> wherever that may be. I think those Jesuits recruited their men from those
> in the real world, drinkers, smokers, soldiers, sailors, bombardiers,
> powder
> monkeys,
>  anywhere other than the normal run of entry to the law of the
> cloth, a latin tuition and work on Sunday mostly.
>
> This priest knew darts, knew a lot about a lot actually,  most un-priestly
> in that aspect.
>
>  When, or if, you look at a dartboard you see the 20 segment on top,
> either side there is 5 left, and 1 right, and outside these are 12 on the
> left and 18 on the right. If you throw your three darts, and you are
> average you may get a 20 with one, and likely a 5 or one with the other,
> the third dart is iffy, if you aimed at the bull you at least increased
> the possibility of hitting the board, within the metal ringed scoring area
> and likely a one or 5, again. Summing that, and to maximise or promote
> your scoring ability, you might have a 20 plus a 5 plus a five which
> equals 30, and you take your thirty off your score, which commences at 501
> ordinarily.
>
> It is a weird anomaly occasionally seen around a dart board, that
> subtracting after summing your score.
>
> Players who are dunces, in maths mainly, but you are a dunce really if you
> fail the
> lot, but maths idiots have an inate ability to multiply, add and subtract
> their dart scores, way above and over their demonstrated activity, ability,
> in the
> class room. People, boys, men, who can't add two numbers in a class, are
> now
> capable of summing the product of triple 20, triple 5 and a 16. The
> summing is the hard part, the easier part is tripling, and the easiest of
> all is subtracting that score from your previous score, then getting it
> correct and announcing it right..
>
> Forget the maths text, and teaching, let's play darts at school, you are
> going to learn stuff real fast. Then strangely, or weirdly as I said
> before,
>  the same class room maths avoiders will work out, in their head,
> subconsciously,
>  that a triple 14, a 6 and a double 5 will win them
>  the game and can hardly wait for their turn at darts. Any one of them are
> genius at that, and continue to be even though their darts are awry, they
> can adjust and re-calculate their requirement mid turn. It's amazing,
> truly.
>
> So, back to the board, you are standing there with your first dart of your
> turn and looking at 20, double 20 if within the metal fence at the top,
> triple 20 if in the metal segment, half way down, and narrowing.
> Professionals, those who are old enough to dart and drink I mean, may have
> the expertise to triple 20, to the dart persons poem of 180, but you don't
> and nor will you until you are in your 40's and play 9 games twice a week
> until you reach that milestone. The dart leaves your hand flat but falls
> after that, it appears as a parabola, it may be that too but at the end of
> its flight the dart tip is angling down to a lesser or greater extent than
> when it left you and your paw. It is better, way better, for the dart tip
> to be heading to a portion of the board that is expanding, in width for
> starters, to counter any off target impulse you gave the dart shaft at its
> release. With this information you should aim at 19, bottom left, about
> 7.00pm if that helps non-dart savvy people, and there are a few of us. The
> 19
> segment has as its borders the 3 and 7, and outside them is 16 on the
> left and 17 on the right. Immediately you can see that your scoring will
> be enhanced, if your aim isn't, say you got the  19, plus a 7 plus a
> seven, using the your scoring ability as discussed elsewhere. You now have
> a score of 33. Only 33, only 3 better, but that matters, and that matters
> a lot as the game progresses. Importantly your dart is falling into the
> expanding segment, the slice is widening as it runs from the bull to the
> outer ring and with your dart tip angled as it is you would hope that your
> aim would improve. It does, it may, it should, it might.
>
> There was a discussion, him to me, about the actions of the wings, the
> feathers
> on the end of the dart away from the tip, to clarify. They were there to
> stabilize
> and balance the weight of the dart proper. Its centre of gravity is about
> where
> you grasp it, perhaps a little forward, and the feathers provide down force
> firstly,
> counter balancing the gravity of the tip end. Your point of aiming on the
> board is
> a little, a lot for some, above your line of sight, the apogee of flight I
> called it, wrongly.
> When the dart leaves your hand its flight is governed by its weight and the
> impetus you
> gave it, it's directional path is obviously imparted by you, the feathers
> ensure it stays
> on the narrow and straight and it should not turn, spin, because that
> undoes
> some of the
> action of the feathers. There is more, lots of it, about the parallax
> effect
> for starters, about
> the dart flight properties when it is better, aimly, for the dart to be
> moving sideways as well
> as forwards, how releasing a little back from the line is beneficial for
> those of us, nearly all
> of us, who stand open to the board, and for the others who turn side on,
> close over, there is a trick or three to help them too.
>
>  He was a bombardier and he knew stuff.
>
> Your normal strategy, at the start, was to think and go for triple 20. But
> you don't have the expertise for that, 2 games a week for 25 years is what
> I was told was the minimum training required to logically think you could
> get there, or that, by design. Instead the 19 play is where you are right
> now, abilitywise, and missing the 20 segment, as expected let's face it,
> puts your dart in the low scoring 5 or one zone. Players with skill, and
> thinking they can place their dart two thirds of the time, are still
> better in the 19 segment, a triple, a double or a single with one of those
> two is still geographically easier with the falling tip, the expanding
> segment, the ability level of you in actuality. The tip is likely to
> encounter the metal enclosure of a double or triple with it falling off
> and in any event the largest, widest then, segment is still available to
> snag your dart and a 57 is more likely than a double in the 20 segment.
>
> Truly awful darters, me and my mates, should aim for the bull probably
> because this increases our chances of (a)hitting the board , (b) accruing
> a score, promoting yourself as a dead eye when, not if, it happens. The
> next level along, still awful but better, should try for the 14 segment
> and the numbers around that, as the average score arising is perhaps
> better, by a little than elsewhere, or the 16 segment for much the same
> reasons.
>
> Your best average is 19, you can nearly be assured of averaging that with
> three darts, and missing the 19 of course. The 'average' double on the
> board
> is 21, double 1 is 2, double 2 is 4 type of thing. The 'average' treble is
> 31.5. The double area occupies about 10% of the board area and there is a
> no go zone outside that, no score is possible there and this has to be a
> factor. The treble area is about 5% of the  total board area with the
> added advantage of the metal fence able to correct and direct your dart to
> the inside, or the outside and outside scores points no matter where. The
> average single point score is 10.5 and there are strategies available to
> harness those scores of 11 or more which is advantageous to your game plan
> and your now exposed and somewhat inability to get that damn dart to
> behave as you want.
>
> The dart board big numbers are always between smaller numbers, in a
> sequence. Trying for a 20 and getting a one means a difference of 19, a
> tragedy, and your game strategy should always be to avoid these and those
> disparities. Utilising 19, 16, 14 or a number greater than 10.5 will help
> you there.
>
> All of this from a catholic priest while driving home after serving mass
> at an outlying village, there were 11 parishioners, and a friendly dog and
> some chirping crickets, and him and me in his Valiant. Fascinating bloke,
> a man of the world, who came to the priesthood late, after the Royal Air
> Force
> and via Hungary where he had been a tractor mechanic .
>
>  Mum said later he had a struggle to get a frock because he had a child or
> children. Even more fascinating.
>
> The priest continued with a strategy for ending the game, you must end on
> a double, as in you have 22 points left, a double eleven wins it, you hit
> 14, you have 8 points lefts, a double 4 wins it, you hit 4, you have 4
> points left, a double 2 wins it and you do it with the throw of your third
> dart. If you don't peg out, all that happens mostly is a challenge for a
> new game. Let the other player throw first, give yourself something to
> beat, other than yourself. But back to the end of the game, it is
> important to stay live, that's what he said, don't bust with any of your
> darts, just score with all of them, reducing you required 'get' all the
> time, make every dart count, or actually, deduct, from your holding total.
> The goal is always score more than 40 with each row of three, this will
> take you further towards a winning completion than the other average
> thrower, which has been scored out over thousands of games as 29 point
> something, three darts aggregating 29 points is the average that the
> average player scores, and you are average but scoring 40, by pre
> planning, and if in a game of 8 rows (throws of three he means) your
> opponent is lodged somewhere near 230 points, and you are a minimum of 88
> points in advance of him or her, just by scoring in the 19 segment for
> starters. Once your score reduces to less than 100 you can strategise even
> more with single 16's or 14's and even the easy hit singles, 9 or less,
> will allow you to double down quickly to zero and a win. All the while you
> are mentally calculating your remainder, trebling and subtracting,
> doubling and the same, and the easier single deduction and who can't take
> 9 or something less away from a number. You are too dangerous for darts if
> you can't deduct, multiply, add and divide as required, meaning you are
> too young if you haven't got those skills yet. Darts will sharpen your
> mental acuity. There you have it, a lesson in life.
>
> At that time we, my parents and me, don't have a dart board, but the Club
> does, it has
> several roads or tracks leading from a line on the floor towards the wall
> with the
> board at the required height, I'll find that out for you, and illuminated
> with a shadowless and bright large capacity globe shielded by a strong
> metal hood sitting on the end of a flexible stem. Strangely, the hood has
> dents in it, presumably from the errant, ill-aimed, or more likely, the
> disgusted throwing of remaining darts from a player who went bust, and
> it's not their fault.
>
>  He and I, the priest and me, had curried prawns for tea, a popular
> delight even though it is 470 miles from the ocean here, and he had a
> brandy and I had a tonic and my dart tuition started and went for several
> hours. My shoulder, the left because I am left shouldered, was feeling it
> and I got beat by a better player on the night, that's all. He, the
> priest, did the triple 20 (one 'undred and eigh  tee) but mostly me and
> him concentrated on the 19 quadrant and even in this shortened lesson it
> was obvious to me that my score was enhanced as a result, I had no prior
> competition to compare it to, it just seemed to me that the numbers
> accumulated.
>
>  It was up to me to mentally score each of us, his doubles, trebles and 19
> and my single spot 19 and occasional 17, because of the aiming inability I
> brought to the line. There is a mental workout in this sport, I told you
> about that earlier, aggregating, deducting, formulating a double down
> towards a finish. Mum was playing cards, and Dad was counting money and I
> was playing darts with a disciple of God, you'd have to lose, right. He
> thought it was funny, and even more, he was glad nobody had approached him
> for a blessing, themselves, or their cards, or the skinny they had for the
> pokies. Chrissy was going to come to tea but didn't when darts were
> mentioned, no thank q she said, she said q too.
>
>  Me, at 13, being in the club was permitted for the purpose of a meal, and
> then staying for recreation is allowed, although not by the licensing
> laws. Kids, people my age, play carpet bowls, ping pong, do craft, watch
> drama, watch pictures, all under the roof, with air conditioning, although
> essentially they may be on or in licensed premises. There are no bars, no
> poker machines, no other adults really in the area, the dart boards occupy
> the wall which forms the back drop to the beer room and there is no access
> from where I was to a beer area direct. Why am I going to great lengths to
> defend my presence in a beer hall building, well, because the priest
> thought it unnecessary to walk out the side door, along the footpath, and
> in through the front door, past the entry and welcome area, down a hall,
> through a room full of poker machines to reach a bar where he could buy a
> drink of alcohol, then reverse the walk of shame to get back for his turn
> at darts, and in the meantime I told him I had hit one 'undred and
> eight-ee and what, you don't believe me and when I replayed my go I got 7,
> a five and one, although nearly a double one on the last of three
> darts, so it was feasible. He mumbled something about confession, and I
> saw the funny side of that.
>
> Towards the end of his tenure in town we began to talk techniques of
> snooker and billiards.
>
>  It never progressed beyond talk though, there was a billiard table at the
> Club, there may have been more than one, but that table seemed to be the
> private ownership of  group of men who had the sole rights to its use, and
> if one of us juniors so much as removed the cloth covering it when it was
> not being played well this led to words and re-crimination and they were
> welcome to it, truly.
>
>  I have played pool in the pub and that has no bearing to anything on the
> big table, with its size and angles and drift and bounce, kiss and push,
> jump and cringe.
>
> Friend Bracer grandparents had a full sized table and it stood in the
> garage
> for
> a few years when that side of their house was modified, I think repaired,
> certainly painted and then they decided to re-furbish the table. It might
> have been based on stone, polished flat I was told, it started pretty flat
> and even and was improved from that. The wooden exposure pieces were
> French polished and the cloth, the baize, the green and grey was renewed.
> Bracer said his Granny bought that cloth, heavy wound stuff it was
> when she was in the UK burying her sister and it was sold to her as the
> right stuff, but it wasn't,  it was too thin or the wrong weave and there
> was 70 pounds lost right there. But the shop who sold it to her heard about
> that, from the other side of the world and wrote to her, Granny, and
> replaced it with the right cloth, best billiards good feeling story ever
> that one. It might have been expensive. All of this was done when the
> table was moved back inside, through the wall of the garage and into the
> room especially for it. There were lights down low, bright lights, and
> pool cue racks and a scoring bar with moveable things that allowed you to
> score, and cheat, and a wide space all around the edge, it was a big room.
> I saw it finished whilst staying nearby and it looked pretty
> business-like. It has been told to me since that the flooring cracked and
> broke under one corner leg and the table was left suspended over the abyss
> for a while until the builder returned to repair everything. The floor was
> inadequate I believe, not strong to hold the table which is reported to
> hold several tons of rock, wood, cloth and polish. I have never played it,
> nor has Bracer as he is not allowed and when he  saw it last it was waiting
> to
> be repaired and was the repository for books, magazines and clothes
> awaiting ironing, and that green baize, the first lot, folded and waiting
> on a new use somewhere I imagine.
>
> The priest's time in town came to an end. He wasn't sure where he would be
> in the next week, he didn't care much either, every where he went I bet
> there would be people who would be amazed and happy that this new father
> was not going to preach to or at them, not do the hard or loud talking to
> keep them on the religious straight and narrow. He was a hippie by any
> definition, truly, except his white collar gave him away, that and his
> tailored suit and long pointed shoes, sensible beard growth. Otherwise he
> wore boardies when down at the pool, or skiing on the river, and he was
> fit, fit looking. He fasted, didn't eat, two days a week.
>
> He was good, great compared to us, at tennis.
>  He used my racquet, full sized Slazenger and I used Mum wooden Dottie, 8
> tenths full size.
> Either way, both implements got broken strings and he, the priest, re
> strung
> them, there is a machine in the sports store,
>  unused because no user is known but they did have several packets of
> strings, ovals, not the clear nylon rounders, and those racquets fairly
> twanged and hummed after that.
>
>  He was big on the serve, bullets they were but other kids in town were
> developing that style of game,
>  not me because I was kind of thankful if I got it in after getting it over
> the net.
>  His control was good too, his forehand was almost never down the line, he
> went that extra body yard to get to the other side of the ball,
>  to slam it angled back at you and you watched as it passed in front, and
> bounced out of reach
>  when the standard reply was for you to backhand a return off his drive.
>  Angle and spin he said several times, he wasn't big on top spin, but he
> had
> it and it was only the saggy daggy balls we had that held him back.
>  There was an audible thwack, louder than any others, other persons, when
> he
> struck the ball
> and it seemed to be struck well, spinning back at you, seemingly growing
> and
> narrowing with the impetus he had imparted,
> and it came back over the net about a foot up then dived, bounced and
> flattened.
> Or he went that extra yard as I said, and that ball trajectory curved at
> you
> then in the last bit it turned away.
>
>
> I was going to work after school, some days later, riding down the ramp
> and driveway of the motel where I cut through from my back gate to the
> main road then up to the wood yard from there. Tickles, my football coach,
> called me over from his F100 driving past, he is the local constable
> otherwise. He asked if I had heard about the new football coach and I
> asked what do you mean and he said, you know, the priest who has been
> telling all and sundry how football goes, when to tackle, how to tackle,
> when to pass off, run straight, run oblique, you know. I ignored that and
> said that the priest was an interesting bloke, with footy knowledge, and
> it's a pity you don't go to church sometime. I had to do 20 pushups at
> training, for weeks, until he was delayed, dealing with murderers, they
> said. I am sure Tickles does know more about footy than anybody, anybody
> else I know. He maintained that my bike paint was 'reckless' and the
> chrome tones of my handlebars and back rack were different therefore
> 'recklessly endangered other road users' and 'culpably contributed to
> sickening other persons, including oneself, and my gold fish'. Tough, or
> what, and don't laugh, ever, because that converts to pushups.
>
>
> ---
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>
>
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